Two Out of Three
So Dr. Phil has a nice long piece on the Rangers signing Sammy Sosa.
By Dr. Phil's standards, it's actually pretty restrained. I mean, it takes him seven paragraphs before he breaks out this:
So running through the script checklist: Corked bat. Check. Leaving early. Check. Boom box...no check!
No boom box reference? Come on, Dr. Phil! Isn't it like a rule for all you Chicago columnist guys -- if you talk about Sammy, you gotta work in the cork, the AWOL, and the boom box.
I'm just looking out for you, Dr. Phil. I'd hate to see you get drummed out of the punditocracy...
By Dr. Phil's standards, it's actually pretty restrained. I mean, it takes him seven paragraphs before he breaks out this:
There haven't been many smiles in recent years. His 2003 season was marked by a
suspension for using a corked bat and two ugly beanings. He and Cubs manager Dusty Baker sparred in '04 before Sosa snuck out of Wrigley Field early on the last day of the season, a move that made it easier for the Cubs to trade him to Baltimore.
So running through the script checklist: Corked bat. Check. Leaving early. Check. Boom box...no check!
No boom box reference? Come on, Dr. Phil! Isn't it like a rule for all you Chicago columnist guys -- if you talk about Sammy, you gotta work in the cork, the AWOL, and the boom box.
I'm just looking out for you, Dr. Phil. I'd hate to see you get drummed out of the punditocracy...
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